


Attractive Forces

by lil_1337



Category: Defying Gravity (1997)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-09
Updated: 2011-10-09
Packaged: 2017-11-07 01:12:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/425296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lil_1337/pseuds/lil_1337
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pete wakes up in the hospital after being assaulted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Attractive Forces

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: The dialogue comes directly from the movie and italics indicate thoughts. The scene in question where Pete wakes up in the hospital and faces John is shown much more through body language then words. Pete is visibly confused by John’s reactions and has no idea about the soul searching that has gone into them. I’ve always been curious about the path his thoughts took to get him from the beginning of the scene to the end. Given that Pete has been in a coma, heavily medicated, and has lost a chunk of time I wrote his thoughts in a stream of consciousness style.
> 
> It is never stated how long Pete was actually in a coma so I made an educated guess based on events that occur while he is unconscious. In addition I made the assumption that Pete is suffering from traumatic amnesia and doesn’t not remember the details of the attack, just the fight he had with John right before.

_The lights are too bright and everything is so white. It should be night. Did something happen? Why are mom and dad here? Who is taking care of the dogs? Everything hurts and my eyes won’t stay open. It feels like someone is sitting on my chest. Why is it so hard to breathe? Fuck my voice sounds like crap. Is mom crying? She never cries. Oh, God what happened? I need to tell her I love her and it’s okay. I’m so tired. My eyelids feel like they weigh a ton. I love you guys. I…_

_I think I fell asleep. Why is it still so bright? Where are mom and dad? Oh, okay, they’re still here just sitting down. I thought I dreamed that. Water, great idea, dad maybe I can talk now. Yeah, that’s better I sound more like myself. My head is pounding and nothing makes sense. I’m in the hospital because I was bashed. That’s what the doctor just said. Something about a hate crime and the cops caught the guys. Good! Fuck! Does everyone know I’m gay? I was going to tell them. Do they hate me? I don’t remember any thing, but the fight with John. I’d like to forget that. I was walking and…That’s all. It’s all fucking blank after that._

_They’re rising up the bed. That’s good, my back likes it and I can see more than just the ceiling. I hate just laying here. I’ve ready lost two weeks. Two fucking weeks completely gone. I’ll never catch up and I missed Rush. I promised Todd and Stewie I’d be there for it. Is it midterms yet? I can’t remember. I don’t want to have to take Calc II again. Once was bad enough. Someone’s running down the hall. I didn’t hear any alarms. Do they really do that or is it just something from the movies?_

_Fuck! It’s Griff. Why is he here? Someone might think he’s gay if he’s here. He should be off with the bros pretending to be something he’s not. I don’t want to see him. I don’t want him to see me like this. I can’t deal with his games and wanting something I’ll never have. I just want it all to go away. Why he is looking at me like I’m the best thing he’s ever seen? Please tell him to go away._

“Honey, um, I could, uh, go for a cup of coffee. How about you?”

_Mom?_

“Nah, not really.”

_Thank God. I love you, dad. I don’t want to be alone with him. It’s just too hard._

“Oh, of course you could. There’s that little shop down in reception.”

“Okay.”

“You take care.”

_Dad’s squeezing my leg. He used to do that when I was little and scared. It has a reminder he was always there with me no matter what. Why are they leaving? I don’t want to be alone with him. I can’t be. Dad doesn’t want to go and mom is talking him into it. What the hell is she thinking? She’s usually the one who fusses and treats me like a baby. Please don’t leave me alone with Griff. I can’t deal with him right now. Please, I’m begging you._

“It’s good to see you again, sir.”

_It’s good to see you again? When did Griff get friendly with my dad? Why are they acting like they know each other? What happened while I was out? Now he’s shutting the door. Please, God just make him go away._

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“How ya feeling?”

_How am I feeling? Like shit. Like someone beat me with a baseball bat and kicked me in the head. How the hell do you think I’m feeling asshole? Every part of my body aches and I have no idea what the fuck is going on._

“Like shit.”

“I uh, brought some of your stuff by.”

_And? Is that supposed to make me feel better?_

“Your favorite.”

_Those aren’t my favorite boxers. You don’t know anything about me. I wear them because you like them. I never told you because it would be too gay for you. You’re happy to get your rocks off with me, but that’s it. I’m nothing more than your buddy anywhere else._

“Those aren’t my favorite.”

“Guess they’re my favorite.”

_Take the damn boxers if you like them so much. Go away and leave me alone. I don’t need you and you made it clear you didn’t want me. I’m tired, I hurt and I just want to sleep. If you aren’t going to wake me up before you leave or take me on a date you don’t get to lay a claim to knowing what underwear I like to wear._

“They have you wired for sound.”

“Yeah.”

_I don’t want to chat and pretend like we are at some stupid frat party. I hurt too much to make the effort. Please just go away and let me lick my wounds. I’m tried of pretending to be your friend and wanting to be your lover. I’m done with being fuck buddies and people who won’t admit who they are. I want a boyfriend who with be happy to be seen with me._

“I’m pretty tired.”

“Okay. I’ll just…”

_And now you act sad and dejected? What the fuck do you want from me? I’m the victim here. Stop hovering over me and go away. Why are you still holding onto my boxers? You’re going to twist them all out of shape._

“Wait.”

_God I hate myself for never being able to say no. You are such a baby and yet it kills me to see you sad or hurting. Why did I have to fall for a frat brother who is so far in the closet he’d have to cross Narnia to get to the wardrobe? I must be an idiot._

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for coming.”

_That smile. It’s the one that I fell in love with. When you look at me like that I never want to look away. It’s what kept me hoping all this time. God dammit, why does it make the world seem like everything is okay even when it isn’t?_

“Oh, man.”

_Did your voice just break? Fuck, I swear it looks like you are going to cry. What the fuck is going on here? I must still be dreaming. You never show anything, but that stupid grin._

“We have a lot to talk about.”

_Now you wants to talk? You had a chance to do that and you made it pretty clear that you didn’t want anything from me than to be fuck buddies. Why now? I don’t get this. It’s too much to wrap my head around even if I was thinking clearly._

“I moved out of the house.”

_What the fuck? Did Armageddon happen while I was unconscious? John Griffith ditched the bros and decided to grow up? I must have really fucked my head up and I’m hearing things._

“I know.”

_How does he do that? Know what I’m thinking just by looking at me. Yeah, you’re an asshole, but damn it I still love you. God knows why._

“Ow. Ow.”

“What?”

“Ow. Hurts”

_Goddamit it hurts to laugh. Stupid fucking John, he always makes me laugh when I don’t want to. He knows I can’t stay mad at him and he uses it against me every fucking time._

“Don’t laugh.”

“Ow.”

“Why are you laughing?”

“It’s you.”

“Stop it.”

“I can’t. You are such an asshole.”

_Seriously, some days I wonder about myself for falling for you so hard. You can be such a spoiled baby and yet there is that charm that I just can’t resist. Why are you so fucking adorable when you look shy and hopeful like this? It makes me want to kiss you when I should punch you._

“I swear this will never happen again.”

_This? Which this? The one where I get the shit kicked out of me? The one where you deny that I mean something to you? I’m not sure I trust or believe you. I shouldn’t even consider giving you another chance, but I want to be with you so bad my heart aches thinking about it. God, I am such an idiot!_

“I’m going to need your help to figure some stuff out.”

_Yeah, I can help you with that if you are going to honest with yourself and me._

“Yeah?”

_Holy shit are you going to kiss me? In public? Since when do you kiss anyone? You barely do it when we are having sex and then I have to initiate it._

“Ow.”

“Sorry.”

_Stupid fucking IV. It would have to get in the way._

“Ow. You never were much for kissing.”

_And it really hurts when you turn your head or move away. I want to be kissed and held in and out of bed. I want to wake up with you, read the paper and have breakfast. I need you by my side as my partner not just my buddy and bro. Can you do that?_

“Oh, yeah?”

_Yeah. Since the first time we did it. You’ve shied away and…Whoa! That was a hell of a kiss, not only was it where someone could walk in it was tender and hot as hell. Now that smirk I know all too well. This nose piece has got to go though. It pokes and I want more kissing. Lots more. I want to fall asleep and wake up to that._

“Yeah.”

_I can smirk just as well as you can. This is a good start to showing me what you want for us. If you can look at me and kiss me like you are now when someone could walk in then maybe you are ready to start talking about things. Something good should come from this shit and if it has made you figure out who you are then I am willing to try again. As long as you keep kissing me like that._


End file.
